I'm a simple emigrant and I escaped from a giant spider

Another thing I love about Germany is that there’s no possibility of accidentally getting stung by a scorpion while putting on your shoes or of finding a snake when you walk into a small space, and you’ve arrived, you know. But sometimes there are frightening creatures here too. We were recently guests in a two-story apartment, with the second floor under the roof. The ceiling there was very high; with my height of about 1.5 meters I could reach it only with a cannon. So when at night I found a huge spider on the ceiling in front of the bedroom door, at first I decided to pretend nothing happened. But that wasn’t enough for long; after about five minutes I said to my friend: “Want to see something I wasn’t happy to see myself?” He said, “Sure.” In short, I showed him the spider. And it was decided that we must now look at it without blinking, because if we step away and come back, and the spider isn’t here anymore, that’s the end. That can only mean one thing: the spider has already crept into the bedroom, hid behind the pillow in the bed and is just waiting to bite my head off! But the solution, as you understand, isn’t long-term; sooner or later we’ll have to sleep. Therefore we decided to go on the offensive. I don’t kill such creatures, I usually just catch them with a piece of paper and a cup and toss them off the balcony like Spartans. But this spider is smart, it climbed to such a height and sits there, looking with its eight eyes! And we’re not amateurs either; we engineered the highest possible construction: a small ladder + an outstretched arm of a tall friend + a vacuum cleaner hose. It was decided to suction the spider up with the vacuum and then carry it out. In the end, we crept up on our knees and sucked the spider up! I shuddered, and my friend says the spider is so big that you can feel it through the hose. I became a bit scared to open the vacuum immediately and pull the spider out, in case we angered it. And I came up with a brilliant idea to take the vacuum to the first floor and lock it in the toilet until morning. So we did. Moreover, in the morning more friends were supposed to come; I thought they’d be curious why the vacuum is in the toilet. In the morning we get up, go to check the canister, and the spider isn’t in it. Right, then we simply burned down the whole house and moved. And what kind of wildlife have you encountered in Germany? P.S. Spider, if you’re reading this, we didn’t mean to harm you, don’t look for us! #curiosities